Flying 100,000 Miles,Surviving Airplane Food and the Pez Museum

• Never rent an American car. Japanese or Korean is the way to go.

Rental Car

• Never “Upgrade” to an SUV, there is no way to park it in San Francisco and there is no need for nine passengers on a business trip.
• On the way to California never check in any luggage. A TravelPro trolley is an investment for life.
• Take enough cloths for one week+.
• Laundry bags are really useful. Not the ones that say “IDF Basic training 1991”.
• No need to wear  smelly clothes. Laundry is cheap and sponsored by your employer.
• The dry clean guy would always ask for three+ days and can always do it in one day, unless it is Saturday.
• It is OK to check luggage on the way back from San Francisco to Tel Aviv, but the gifts to the spouse with you.
• If the trolley does not fit in the overhead compartment,on the way back , take our the laundry bag and put it under the seat. I said it would be useful.
• Sleeping pills are a great invention.
• Never eat on US Airways. Never eat on Continental. Never eat on Delta.
• Unless you fly business (I’m not…). If so, take the filet minion and shrimps. It is pay back for all the “pasta” or “chicken”.
• Egg white omelet is not horrible. American omelets are made out of three eggs, by default. that’s 30 eggs for a ten days trip. Bacon not included.
• Continental Presidents’ club in Newark has no food (cheese and crackers does not count). But it has a shower !
• There are nice wine bars in both Newark and Philadelphia. Airports are expensive anyway, at least this is fun  and the service is good.

• 

  Wine and Oysters

• Walgreen sells five t-Shirts for $10. No need to carry gym shirts with you. Leave them as charity (after laundry) on the way back.
• You don’t have to visit Burlingame museum of Pez Memorabilia. But maybe.

Burlingame Museum Of Pez Memorabilia

Burlingame Museum Of Pez Memorabilia Picture

An Israeli and an American board On an Airplane

The Israeli woman is 35 years old, and carries 1.5 years old baby boy, three years old girl and seven bags with diapers, puzzles, scratch books, pacifiers, extra cloths, Kleenex, bottles and a little foldout nuclear radiation shelter, just to be on the safe side.

The American is 60ish,  full-bodied dance teacher in a community college with an elegant  carry on bag that could be used for a small elephant.

Unfortunately, they are seated together, at row 7 seats A,B,C, just after what continental likes to call “First Class”. For those of you who have not traveled 100,000 miles these year , this row has extra leg room, but only two places for carry on bags, and none are allowed while takeoff or landing.

Opening scene : build-up.

The Israeli women boards the plane, bitter look in her eyes, screaming baby on one arm and nagging daughter on the other.

Her Hi-Tech husband is lucky to be far away, because if looks could kill they probably will. She locates two of her bags in front of her, one kid is sitting on her lap and the other next to the window.

The American lady sits next to them. looking for a place to store her bag.

AM: Could you please put one of your bags in the overhead department ?

IL: I need my bags all the time.

AM: I need a place to put my bag.

IL: I need it for the kids, the kids need it. I will need it every second.

AM: Maybe you can move it away a bit ?

IL: You don’t understand (Very bitter look on her face), it’s for the kids, you are a grown women, they can’t be without their toys.

AM: I’ll ask the flight attendant for help.

FA: How can I help?

AM: We only have a place for two bags.

IL: But I paid for two tickets ! I should get a place for two bags, she is an old lady, they are just kids.

FA:  I can help you find a spot just over your head, it’s not a problem.

IL: But you don’t understand, I need it all the time.

FA: Maybe you can keep all the urgent things in one bag and I’ll put the second bag right here, so the lady could have a place for her bag as well ?

IL: I’ll have to go in and out all the time, they needs their things.

FA: I think we are going to have a lot of fun for the next five hours.

Scene Two: The Senior flight Attendant.

SFA: All bags should be placed in the overhead department during takeoff and landing.

IL: But I need my bags.

SFA: These are the security regulations, please give me your bags.

IL: But the other attendant did not tell me about it. He should have told me about it.

SFA: You are delaying all of the plane , could you please hand me your bags?

IL: Take them, but the kids are going to cry.

AM: ( whispering) Is there another seat available on the plane?

IL: I’m not a bad person. I’m not a bad person. I heard that you want to switch, but I’m not a bad person.

AM: ( To me ) Are there many Israelis on this flight?

Related Articles

• How to get most out of carry-ons for a comfortable flight (travelinglinds.wordpress.com)
• 6 places germs breed in a plane (cnn.com)

Rants, Raves and Pride

Raves

• Found a wine bar in Newark. Nice bar tender, good wine and small tasty dishes.
• Great Greek restaurant in New York – Kefi
• Holiday-Inn with a roof top pool is great when its 30 degrees Celsius
• Seven hours don’t give me a jet-lag. Cool.
• The office is funnier each time i watch it. VOD on airplanes is cool. Only one reboot this flight.
• WiFi in buses.
• Nike opened up a custom store for the Mondeal . Free TV and free food. Nice concept.
• Central Park.

New York Bus from Newark

Central Park Baseball

Rants

• Holiday-Inn with 802.1b wireless network . That’s 2Mbps per second for you ! for $200 a night.  You must be kidding.
• Tried to take the bus from Newark to the city to some time and the planet. The result was a two hours drive and than 13 streets walk in 30 degrees Celsius after a 12 hours flight.
• Tried to to take the train back to Newark.  I always forget Penn station is inside Madison Square garden. Why can’t the sign be idiot-proof like regular American guidance?
• Online forms that require me to fill a state, although I’m not from the USA. Is George Bush still the president ?
• Gyms with t-Shirts that say “Train Hard or Go Home”
• Restaurants that don’t carry tooth-picks

Nike Mondeal Store

Soccer Dog 2010

Pride

• Very nice game by Germany. I think they have good chance of winning.
• Nice Pride parade in New York. No shooting as well.
• The PHD ceremony in Bar Ilan university  had about 60% women, as far as I could count. Very encouraging , IMO. Only two Arabs, which is less encouraging.

Pride in New York 2010

Germany Soccer 2010