An Israeli and an American board On an Airplane

The Israeli woman is 35 years old, and carries 1.5 years old baby boy, three years old girl and seven bags with diapers, puzzles, scratch books, pacifiers, extra cloths, Kleenex, bottles and a little foldout nuclear radiation shelter, just to be on the safe side.

The American is 60ish,  full-bodied dance teacher in a community college with an elegant  carry on bag that could be used for a small elephant.

Unfortunately, they are seated together, at row 7 seats A,B,C, just after what continental likes to call “First Class”. For those of you who have not traveled 100,000 miles these year , this row has extra leg room, but only two places for carry on bags, and none are allowed while takeoff or landing.

Couple putting suitcase in overhead compartment

Opening scene : build-up.

The Israeli women boards the plane, bitter look in her eyes, screaming baby on one arm and nagging daughter on the other.

Her Hi-Tech husband is lucky to be far away, because if looks could kill they probably will. She locates two of her bags in front of her, one kid is sitting on her lap and the other next to the window.

The American lady sits next to them. looking for a place to store her bag.

AM: Could you please put one of your bags in the overhead department ?

IL: I need my bags all the time.

AM: I need a place to put my bag.

IL: I need it for the kids, the kids need it. I will need it every second.

AM: Maybe you can move it away a bit ?

IL: You don’t understand (Very bitter look on her face), it’s for the kids, you are a grown women, they can’t be without their toys.

AM: I’ll ask the flight attendant for help.

FA: How can I help?

AM: We only have a place for two bags.

IL: But I paid for two tickets ! I should get a place for two bags, she is an old lady, they are just kids.

FA:  I can help you find a spot just over your head, it’s not a problem.

IL: But you don’t understand, I need it all the time.

FA: Maybe you can keep all the urgent things in one bag and I’ll put the second bag right here, so the lady could have a place for her bag as well ?

IL: I’ll have to go in and out all the time, they needs their things.

FA: I think we are going to have a lot of fun for the next five hours.

LUTON, ENGLAND - DECEMBER 22:  A passenger sleeps in the terminal building of Luton airport on December 22, 2009 in Luton, England. Adverse weather conditions of heavy snowfall have caused cancellations to flights and trains across the country as well as forming long queues on the roads.  (Photo by Oli Scarff/Getty Images)

Scene Two: The Senior flight Attendant.

SFA: All bags should be placed in the overhead department during takeoff and landing.

IL: But I need my bags.

SFA: These are the security regulations, please give me your bags.

IL: But the other attendant did not tell me about it. He should have told me about it.

SFA: You are delaying all of the plane , could you please hand me your bags?

IL: Take them, but the kids are going to cry.

AM: ( whispering) Is there another seat available on the plane?

IL: I’m not a bad person. I’m not a bad person. I heard that you want to switch, but I’m not a bad person.

AM: ( To me ) Are there many Israelis on this flight?


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